Machiavelli

Another COVID-time review! Ugh, that's gonna be a thing now, isn't it? Yep, I'm gonna be that girl that came out of blogging retirement to write about f*cking COVID. Ew. Anyhoot, Machiavelli never disappoints. Like, NEVER. Every freaking time I go, I love it. Actually, everyone I bring there loves it too. You can't NOT love it.

Obviously, you have to wear a mask. They welcome you by the terrasse at the back, which is pretty much a haven in the middle of the city, a little piece of heaven. It's the cutest thing: cute little tables, cute little chairs, cute little lights, and cute little plants and flowers. Oh, did I mention that it was cute? It's basically the epitome of cuteness. 

We were welcomed quickly, and seated quickly. By the by, in these COVID times, it's always better to reserve beforehand! We got water right away and we ordered very quickly as well. The waitress showed us a QR code that our phones were supposed to decipher for us, but both our phones (or us?) failed. We just went on their website :) They don't have as many choices on their menu as usual, which is just fine. The important ones were still there: PASTA! 

We ordered bread first. Bread and pasta: carbs much? Hahaha! The bread was hot, which is always a relief: I loaf getting cold bread. I mean loathe, hehe. Seriously, when it arrives cold, I almost can't help myself and look at the waiter with a face meaning 'is this a JOKE?'. The butter was this composed butter of trufle and wild mushrooms. Ugh... YASS! Come to mama. That with the hot bread was just p-e-r-f-e-c-t. It took us less time than we were proud of to finish the bread.

Mushroom fettucine with creme sauce, button mushrooms and wild mushrooms, parmesan, and truffle oil. Just thinking about it makes me happy. The fettucine were cooked to perfection: I hate a soft noodle almost as much as I despise a hard one. OK, that sounded very inappropriately sexual. You know what I mean. The arugula gave some spice to it all, and the mushrooms were sooooo good. Great. Creamy. Perf.

The gnocchi (not pictured, Vino dug in too fast 😏) were stuffed with mozzarella and tomato. I'd describe the gnocchi as being like the most comfortable pillow you could ever sleep on. Now, imagine that pillow being in heaven. Softest damn thing in the world (or heaven, I guess). Supes tasty and cheesy and all that good stuff. No wonder my friend Bridget likes them so much: she orders them every time she goes to Machiavelli!

We had dessert. Obviously we were full enough, satisfied enough. But argh, who can resist THIS? We shared, of course. Ok, not 'of course', cause we are cray cray enough to have one each. But we DID share :) OH. MY. GAWD. Just look at it. LOOOOOK! I present to you, the decadent brownie, in all its glory. Sweet, soft, hot goodness with french vanilla ice cream on top, and a port and fresh berries atop THAT. Holy sh*t: decadence at its best. And then we died. A good death, mind you. The  brownie was hot (just like bread, brownies should NOT be served cold), the ice cream was cold (haha!) and not all melted by the time it got to our table. The coulis on top was such a good addition to this dish, and went perfectly with the chocolate AND the ice cream. 

As if our meal wasn't satisfactory enough, the lovely owner (she IS freaking lovely), Natassia, comes up to me and gives me a gift certificate for a picnic for 2! See, I had booked a table for myself and Bridget a couple weeks back and a water main had flooded the street (or something equally uncool), and our resa was canceled :( That was SOOOO nice! We are trying that picinic this weekend! I feel like every time I got to Machia's, she does something special for me. I should give back. A present of sorts. Maybe I should give her GOLD. Where can one get that? I'll look. Well I AM booking two evenings for my birthday at the resto, so... were good? Hahaha!

Service was very good. She took care of all the tables and I, myself, would've probably either died OR been found in a corner, shaking. Ya, I'm just not meant to be a waitress. Not at all. We also got our bill quickly, which is a plus. I hate waiting around to leave.

And now, les scores!

Service: 9

Food: 9

Do I even NEED to say I'll be back? Mmmya, that's what I thought.

Machiavelli

I've been to Machiavelli before: once, about 8 years ago for dinner, and the second time, about 8 months ago for brunch. I absolutely loved it both times. Like, THIS is love. And good for me (and them), I live a 5 minute walk from the restaurant. I went with ma boo, Bridge, who is an ultra regular at Machiavelli. As I was talking to the chef-owner (that, just by the by, has owned this resto for the past 4 years and is freaking TWENTY NINE), she suggested I come for dinner so I can eat to my heart's content and take pics and what have you. That sounds like a pretty damn good deal if you asked me. Go ahead, ask me. YA, iz a GREAT deal.

Machiavelli is this cute little restaurant that has a nice terrace right at the back. Like, supes cute. Lots of flowers and herbs and outdoor lights. On top of it, the ambiance is just lovely. Basically, you feel like you're in a friend's backyard, but with people serving you freaking awesome food. Disclosure: this picture does NOT do it justice.

I asked them to surprise me and told them that the only thing I didn't want to eat was pasta or anything ubs heavz (you get it). Bridge knew exactly what she wanted. Heeeere we gooooo! (Let the feast begin)

The mother f*ckin' giant oyster. This thing was so huge, it had it's own area code. Ya, I went there. Nostalgic for old 'Yo mama's so fat' jokes. Hehehe. Anyhoot. They cut up the meat and mixed in some onions, peppers, cucumbers, and horse radish. There were endive leaves on the side that we were supposed to use as a vessel... but we realized this only after pigging out with the spoon. Wonderful flavours ensued. I would like eight more please.

There was also the Trois petits bernardins (like the mason jars!): three dips with homemade pita chips. Tzatziki with orange essence, salsa of mango, tomato and cumin, and a spread of roasted veggies. My fave was the tzatziki, because it was so smooth and the orange actually fit really well with the garlicky softness. Ya, it's a thang. The middle one was a fresh salsa that Bridge found way too cuminy. I gotta say, I'm fond of the cumz but this WAS on the bit-too-much side of things. A tad too intense. On the other hand, I did love the combo of tomato and mango! The third was the spread of roasted veggies; Bridge's fave. The roasted goodness really came out, especially in what seemed to be eggplant and zucchini. Quote from Bridge: 'I want to eat this forever'. Well said Bridge. Well said!

The escargots. Bridge really wanted them escargots! And now I know why! The ONLY bad thing about this dish was that there were only six. Come oooon, I need at least 14. Sounds like a good number. Sounds like the RIGHT number. I digress. They were perf perf perf. Just cheesy enough and garlicky enough and hot AF, which is what is needed with the escargots. Of course, we dipped the remaining pita in the butter. Duh.

Le foie gras. mama likes her a good foie gras. Mmmm. They marinated it in Brandy for one day with a bit of salt and poached it at just the right temp. It had just a pinch of fleur de sel to make the flavours pop and it was accompanied by somewhat of an apple jammy. A jammy. Just by looking at it, it was spreading itself on le bread. The apple dippy was the perfect pairing. It wasn't too sweet nor too strong tasting, so that the foie gras was still the star of the dish. But when is it not, am I right?

A little palate cleanser is always what the mouth needs between courses. And also because we're fancy damn it. It was raspberry, blueberry and Brandy. It was quite refreshing and my palate called and said it was totes cleansed.

Boo's gnocchi looked DElicious. Stuffed with mozzarella, with a buttery sage sauge. Oh ma gawd. Bridge took one look and said 'oh Imma goonna take this home fosho'. Ya, with her tiny little stomach, poor thing was already ubs full. Even I was gettin' there. OK, think of a cloud. A very fluffy cloud. And now, put it in yo mouth. They were just perfectly round and cheesy. Also, usually, I'm not the biggest fan of sage because I think it's quite a strong herb that is not used very well, but this was so good! It married very well with le cheese. Sage and cheese=winning combo! Let's just say she had the best lunch at work the next day.

Pork El Pastor. I think I'd like anything El Pastor. That sweet mix of pineapple and pork, coriander and onion. That just does it for me. Gimme that every day and I'd be the happiest of girls! The pork was so tender and was breaking up so easily! That is what I love... in life: meat that falls off the bone. It was accompanied by a tasty pineapple salsa that went supes well with the marinated meat. The coriander, as we know, goes with everything. Meat? Yes. Fish? Yes. Seafood? Yes. Veggies? Yes. Dessert? Sure, why not? I had a little taste of the potato and it was just perf on top of perf. Just cooked enough (ugh, I hate over OR undercooked potatoes--it's a fine line!). With a squeeze of lime, it brought this dish to a whole other level.

(Note: my picture was SO bad that I don't feel right posting it here :o )
Le dessert. What? I HAD to have dessert! Pistachio crème brûlée and brownies with blueberry coulis. Decadent? Oh, just a bit. You know, when you've decided to pig out... The crème brûlée was perfectly hard on the outside and soft on the inside. I think I have as much pleasure as Amélie Poulain when I break through the top layer of the crème brûlée! The taste of pistachio wasn't ubs strong, just present enough. The brownie was so soft and moist, I just couldn't, you know, not eat it. And with the blueberry coulis, hello. Oh, hello.

Service was right ON throughout the evening. I gots to be honest here and say that most times, when I am invited to a restaurant, MY service is rockin' and not so much for the other patrons. In this case, everyone looked happy. Our waitress totes accepted the fact that we were speaking in Frenglish (no explanation needed), and she, herself, started speaking the same language :) We got water quickly, we got an ice bucket for le wine and she asked us if it was to our liking many times. She also didn't judge us when we got slightly drunk after drinking 1 bottle and a half of wine hahaha. We got to meet Natassia, the chef/owner after our entrées and when we left, and I half drunkenly thanked her SO MUCH for the AWESOME dinner, I don't even think she said thanks... she just said that these two other cooks (next to her) worked as hard and I should thank THEM. And then, I fell in love with her. Natassia, if you read this and you're single, please write to me. (ps: she DOES have a bf, I FB stalked her...pps: YA, I'm like that)

Just FYI, Machiavelli serves up an AWESOME brunch on Sundays!!! I've been and damn it ever was it ever mouth watering! LETS GO!!

And now, les scores!

Food: 9
Service: 9.5

You and I both know Imma be back. And I'm telling everyone I know to go. E-ve-ry-one.

Café International

I got an email asking me if I wanted to come for a free (FREE!) lunch/dinner at Café International in little Italy and try the food. I said no, of course. Ha. Of course I was totes in!

Since, 1968, this establishment has been serving up authentic Italian food from pasta to risotto to pizza! I love all of those thangs. OK, it's a lot of carbs, but when you gym it up 15 hours a week, you're good. I went for lunch. Why? Main reason was that, hey, I know there are going to be less people at lunch, therefore, more attention on ME and more food for ME. Oh, I know, I'm totes smart that way.

The place itself looks like it could use a pick-me-up: white paneled ceiling, old floors, badly lit dining room and old lookin' tables. The chef tells me that they are inviting bloggers so that we can tell dem peeps to go eat there because the last few years have been a hard hit for Little Italy. I think it's been a harder hit for Café International. They've been there longer than most but apart from a couple things here and there, haven't changed much of the decor. So now they are stuck with regulars that are about to croak (low blow, I know) and Italian gangsters. OK, that last one isn't true but I swear there was a group in there that looked very questionable! One of the only cool thing is their neon blue sign outside, which still looks great and means to say 'hello please come in'. It's also a huge space with around 80 seats inside and 20 on the terrace.

I got there and... no one knew I was coming. It felt like when I went to 'La Petite Mangue' with Val and it took 3 people and 12 minutes to finally have someone realize that I was there as a blogger. I'm already not too fond of saying 'hey, I'm a blogger: look at me, look at me' but when I got there, they were not expecting me. They had to go get the chef and even he seemed a bit in the dark at that point. But he was uber nice and we settled on him bringing out small portions of many awesome things. Many. Awesome. Things. Sounds just about right to me!

1st: house ham with aioli and arugula. Yes AND yes. The aioli was amazing with just the right amount of garlic in there. It was nice and thick. The ham was very tasty, somewhat on the salty side but I don't mind that too much when it comes to ham. Hello, home made! It was rather tough at some points so that wasn't as pleasant. The arugula added a certain earthiness to the dish and rounded it off. Oh and they brought grilled bread which was perfect with the ham. No butta, just awesome grilled bread. Yes to the yes.

2nd: house prosciutto with sprouts and squash mostarda. I think this might be part of why they are struggling to have more clients. I mean, who sells mostarda anymore? And why put a handful of sprouts on the plate. I am not a rabbit. No, but seriously. They have a delicious product like home made prosciutto and they put a tree beside it on the plate. No. Alright, so the prosciutto was aged 18 months and right on the damn ball. On. The. Ball. It was salty and soft and was just melting on my tongue. Yes. You could see that the chef took pride in this, as he should. This is why it was weird to me to put it with grass and mostarda. Speaking of mostarda, it was actually good. My last souvenirs of it were not awesome. I really liked the texture and the temperature. It was at room temperature and I guess that's what does it for me and mostarda. Wow, you never here THAT. The taste of the squash came through just enough.

3rd: pizza with pistachio pesto, mozzarella and house bologna. I gotta say I was never a fan of bologna. Neva. My friends would have that in their lunches in high school and I was all like 'ew'. It just tasted too strong for me and a bit fake. But this one was dsamn good. Ya, THAT good. It could have had a tiny bit more salt but it was still a bit crunchy and my taste buds really loved it. The dough was so soft and airy and pretty much a perfect A+. The pesto wasn't pesto though: it was more like pistachios here and there and some oil. It was nice and different to have pistachios on my pizza, but it sure wasn't pesto. I gotta say that it was a lot of bread. A LOT. Although it was like biting into a cloud, it was still bread. I forwent (yes, I use fancy words now) half of that loveliness.

4th: calamari and octopus salad on a bed of mesclun with a tomato, onion, caper and basil salsa on top. What do I despise more than mesclun? Nothing. Nothing is worse. I hate it so much I don't even know how to describe my hate. OK, I'm going to take a chill pill. Chill pill taken. In all honesty (and you guys know how brutally honest I can be), I wish the chef had never served me this dish. A, because it was not up to par and B, because it lowered the overall score for the food. The calamari were squishy, therefore either overcooked or undercooked. Look, it's crazy annoying to cook these bad boys so just don't risk it. You don't really need em' on your menu. The octopus wasn't as bad and had a charred taste to it which was 100% better than the calamari. The salsa was fresh tastin' and capers gave it a nice twist. The whole thing was very much overdressed and so everything kind of became soggy. Oh, ooooooh, I found the thing I hate more than mesclun: soggy, wet mesclun.

#5: gnocchi with tomato and basil sauce. See, if only all my courses could've been as small as this...The gnocchi were, for a lack of a better word, divine. Yep, that's right! They were just perfect: the perfect texture, the perfect taste, the perfect size. The tomato basil sauce was simple, yet very flavourful and the parmesan on top added that extra twang (yep, I'm goin' with 'twang' here!) we all like. That big-ass-GMO basil leaf was only there for colour, I'm guessing. Because, well, although I would totally just eat a leaf like that, I don't know many people who would.

#6: mushroom risotto. I was starting to go into a food coma. This was a huge portion, yet again. The waitress told me that she had hinted to the chef that he should serve risotto next and she was super proud. She was saying how no one actually makes risotto at home because it's so time consuming. I didn't think mentioning that I am quite the risotto making expert would be a good idea. I do make a mean lobster-stock oyster mushroom risotto tho. The rice itself was perfect: a risotto should always keep some kind of bite to it and be all rich and creamy. Rich and creamy are probably my favorite adjectives when it comes to food. Mmmm. The waitress asked if I wanted some pepper and extra parmesan --because there was already some in there--and hells yes I wanted extra parmesan. Let's make something clear; I will always want that extra parm. The mushrooms were nicely cooked but I would have liked a bit of variety instead of plain ol' button shrooms.

#7: tiramisu. This coffee tastin' dessert is not usually my fave. But this one. Oh! This one was...oh! Yes, that's a foodgasm if you haven't noticed. It was creamy, it was soft, it was nutty, it was coffee. It was gone in 2.5 seconds. Hands down the best tiramisu I've eva eva tasted.

 

Service was really good. Well, it had to be, didn't it? I mean, they knew I was there to write a review. At first, the waitress was kind of shy, bringing me the menu and mineral water. But then she started being friendlier, probably because I was there, eating 7 courses, for about 8 hours. OK, 1 hour and a half. Still. The chef served the plates and, although he seemed really introverted, would talk to me about the restaurant and about the dishes.

And now, the scores!

Food: 8 (that damn calamari!)

Service: 9

 

To answer your question, YES I ate everything. And to answer your second question, YES I am a pig. I left on my bike and I'm serious when I say that I don't remember anything from around St-Zotique/Clark to Pine/St-Urbain. It's like I blacked out! Food coma!!! I would definitely go back, especially for the tiramisu. I do hope that they revamp the place to get more customers tho. It would be worth their while.

MKT

Recently, I, as, hum hum, the 3rd most read restaurant blogger (I's GOTTA toot my own horn people!) in Montreal, am getting treated very generously by some restaurants. And no one is happier than I am.... well my guests are pretty effin happy too!

This time, it was MKT on Metcalfe. I had never heard of this place and when I looked at the menu, I wasn't too too excited, to be honest: a Mediterranean restaurant with a simple looking menu but with a big chef behind it. Basically, I got there with absolutely no expectations.

MKT is located on a second floor of a building on Metcalfe close to Sherbrooke. We almost missed it. Maybe we should get better glasses, I dunno. When we got in, I got hit with the whiteness of it all. It really didn't fit my type of decor that I like to see in a restaurant. Everything white, big light fixtures, pastels, wine bottles adorning the walls. The open kitchen in the back seemed to move a lot, which was cool. And having known that I knew someone working there (ps: good job K!!!), I'd gone and say hey! There were only older people but when 8 o'clock came, the younguns came a-flowin' and the atmosphere became more... hip, I believe is the word I'm looking for. The tables were marble and there were about 80 seats in the house. And the music. Don't even get me started on the music! I think that at some point, they put on Much Music Dance Mix 94. Totes serious. At least it was good for a laugh. 

Anyhoot, the maître d' pretty much welcomed us with open arms to... take our jackets :) It was then decided that we were to taste many things on the menu, but with smaller portions. Perfect. This way, we pretty much get to taste the best damn things on there. Oh, and did I mention that the wine/drinks for miss J and I were flowin' all night. No? Well, I just needed an excuse to say that. Drinks. All. Night. Long. 

Mozarella di buffala. I loves me some cheese! I found it a bit on the cold side but it was still awesome in ma mouth. It was soft and just salty enough. The little salsa on top was full of flavour: tomato, olive, basil, more herbal goodness. Just dipping the [homemade] bread in that freakin' awesome olive oil was well worth it! Speaking of the bread, although warm and nicely textured (does that word make sense?), it felt like day old bread. But still. The dipping.

Crab and shrimp cake. Or should I say heaven cake? Yes, we're going with heaven cake. Crevettes de 'matane', pretty much fresh out of the water and for once, real crab! REAL crab people! They were put together to form the awesomeness cake. Mmmmyes. Shrimp: fresh. Crab: oh so fresh. Apple on top was, well, come on. Apple soooo fits with both that it was just a given. The whole thing was brought together by an herb yogourt. Yes. It made it that much tastier and smooth IN my mouth. The hot sauce was hotter than Sriracha! Dsamn! But it also fit really well with the dish. To be honest, it reminded me of my trips to Ogunquit with my mom and my sis when I was young. Cue the crying. Oh and the croutons were perfect. I ate it in 8 seconds. 

Octopus. A couple years ago, before I started this blogging venture, I would not have been caught dead with octopus on my plate (much less in my mouth). But hey, I grew (but not really... still need a step ladder) and my taste buds got, well, better. More refined I should say. White bean purée, white beans, parsley, veggies. The octopus might have been the BEST I've ever tasted. Cooked to freaking perfection and seasoned just well. It's a fine line when you're cooking octopus, just like calamari: a second less or a second too much and it's elastic city. Mama don't like elastics. The puree was smooth and a bit tart, which fit well with the taste of the grilled octopus. Who knew that octopus and white beans would go so well together. SO good. I would like some more right now please. Parsley added freshness to the dish which was nice; made it feel lighter.

Quail with smoked paprika. Yes AND mother f*ckin' yes. Although quail is a tiny bird that I usually dislike nibbling at... I mean it's bones and more little bones. This one was tasty and every little bite of it was oh-so-good. It was grilled which is a flavour profile that I absolutely love. The salad right under it was simple yet lovely and fresh. Carrots, raw onions (which J and I loooove cause we're awesome like dat), and some fennel. Fennel, I have a harder time with. I'm just not a fennel person, but this one was actually good. Everything was seasoned just perfectly and my mouth loved it. The balsamic went really well with the charred-iness (new word alert!) of the quail. 

Gnocchi with provolone and smoked pancetta in a rosé tomato sauce. The gnocchi literally melted in my mouth. It was oh-so-cheesy and well, shiiiiit, I want some right now! It was herbal and tender and smooth and all that jazz. I couldn't really taste the pancetta though. I could see it, but I couldn't taste it. Damn you, taste buds!

Bouillabaisse. Clams? Yes. Mussels? Yes. Shrimp? Oh, hells yes! Basically, this is my heaven. Perfectly cooked fish and seafood in a somewhat spicy and herbal tomato broth. The salmon melted in my mouth and the shrimp were perfectly cooked. And I KNOW shrimp, people! The mussels were perfect and juicy and oh so yummy. The clams were a tad disappointing, with a slightly plasticy feel. The scallops were a tad overcooked but hey, I like my scallops raw or just slightly charred, so I think I'm just being difficult here. The potatoes were too much for me. In my defense, I'd just had an 18 course dinner. OK, not 18. but close. J usually can't stand even slightly spicy stuff and she liked the hell out of this so that counts for 100 points. 

Yes AND yes! Wow, just looking at this, I can taste it again in my mouth. And I must go back. Uh, bebye. Damn it. This was A-mazeballz. Just awesome. Wonderful, really! The semifreddo was a bit crunchy and so creamy and the berries were so fresh and such a perfect match. The hazelnut ice cream felt like the nuts had just been pick from the freakin' tree. There was a bit of mint and lemon to make the whole thing even better and get those flavours IN-MY-MOUTH. The textures on this plate were just lovely and the plate was as good lookin' as the others.

Service was just plain wow. The maître d' took care of us from beginning to end and the waiters/busboys were oh-so-there for us. We actually felt like we were queens. Yes, QUEENS. Our water glasses were always full, our alcoholic beverages, always refilled (just the way we like it!) and the plates were described very well, every time. The last plate took a bit of time to hit our table, compared to the other ones but I think that was the only thing, really. The wine service was perfect, the way they put the plates in front of us was perfect. The everything was perfect. Damn I love it when shiz is perfect!

And now, the scores!

 

Food: 9

Service: 9.5

 

Seriously, one of the best experiences I've had in a restaurant in a LONG time. I urge everyone I know to go. Oh, just dso it!