La Chilenita

What better way or time to eat some empanadas than a picnic in the park? I stopped by La Chilenita on a beautiful weekend afternoon and I was to bring them to Parc Jeanne-Mance, right in front of Mont Royal. Perfect, right? Mmmmya. I tend to do things the perfect way. That is such a lie. But I try.

They only had two kinds left when I got there and I wanted two, so that was the easiest decision I've made, like, eva.

The Chilena: beef, onions, egg and olives. Somewhat of a weird mix, at least in my head. Well, you know what, smack my ass and call me Judy, it was actually a pretty amazing combo. The meat was nice and moist and, the egg and olives went really well with it. Obviously, you KNOW I know onions go well with every damn thing on this earth. Except dessert. But even then :)

The Mediterranean: eggplant, red pepper, green olives and mushrooms. Mmmmm! I loves me some good veggies! This was also a great combo, but I was less surprised by this one. Veggie + veggie + veggie= YES!  The eggplant was good in all the right ways (ya, I'm sayin' that) and the mushrooms were tasty, not watery. The green olives added a salty side and the red pepper, a sweet side! The actual dough was good and not dry at all, as it tends to get sometimes.

And now, the score!

Food: 8.5

I loves me a good empanada so yes, I'll fosho be going back!

Tsukuyomi

The ramen quest continues!!! Let's face it, it's my favourite kind of quest (hey, a blogger must have many quests). I was trying a newbie, Tsukuyomi, with ma main Asian connection, Jer bear. This is the new kid in town and it is very popular, especially with the business lunch crowd. I say 'especially', because I was there for lunch but I'm sure they get quite the amount of peeps in the evening as well.

It's a very cute, and I'd even say quaint restaurant, located on St-Laurent, near an array of new and cool spots. It has lots of noren (long curtains hanging from the ceiling) and lots of wood. The counter kind of goes around the kitchen and then zigzags into the room, which is quite original! Small lamps of different size hung around the room (you know, just hangin' out). They also had some Japanese music playing, which, for all I know, could be Korean or Chinese or Vietnamese. Ya, I'm clueless. That's just me. This is untrue of course. Or IS it? OK, I'm confused again. Dang.

We started with appetizers. Because starting with a main would just be stoooopid. It's not 2,1,3 or b,a,c, people! I hope that made sense to at least one person. Anyhoot, I had the Goma-Ae, cooked spinach with sesame. The spin (such a good word!) was cooked to perfection. On top of it, the sesame and the veggie were, like, a match made in heaven. Although the sauce was uber tasty, it was a bit thick for me, but Jer bear loved it. Jer had the octopus. It had wasabi and nori and it could not have been more fresh. They could have tried but they would not have succeeded. Mmmm, you just had to cradle a little piece of nori in your hand, add some uber tender wasabied octopus and a little bit of spinach and BAM, perfect little roll! This, while crying because of the fresh wasabi.

Le ramen. This is what we were here for. Duh. And the quest CONTINUES! This was said in a very deep voice, by the by. The stock was a bit disappointing in flavor and in thickness. I like a slightly thicker broth. The noodles weren't cooked enough and they looked more like spaghetti noodles than ramen noodles. The bean sprouts were crispy and fresh and adding a bit of chili oil did give it a nice taste. But this was far from saving the dish.

Service was not great. Water was lacking at some point, and it took quite a while for us to get our ramen. You know you have a big lunch crowd, you plan accordingly, no? Yes. The answer is yes. The assistant manager, whom I gave my card (yes, I'm a professional now) to after we were done, was really nice and efficient though. I actually feel a bit bad for writing such a sh*tty ramen review, or remen if you will. No, wait, raview. Bah. sounds the same anyway.

And now, the scores!

Appetizers: 8.5

Ramen: 6

Service: 6.5

The quest must go on! Goodbye Tsukuyomi, hello Yokato Yokabai (still the reigning champ).
 

Da Fish Shack

Another Grand Cayman review! I could get used to this. Fo realz! Maybe I should just move there. Fun fact: I was in Cayman for 13 days and I stopped counting the times that Rachie would whisper, in a very creepy way: 'You should move here'. If I could, you know, work from home, from Cayman, I would jump on that sh*t in 5 seconds. Imagine, instead of my view on the Mont Royal, which I must say ain't so shabby, well, it would be on the freaking Caribbean sea. Ya, I'm down. But before this happens.... Rach and I went for lunch at Da Fish Shack, located right smack downtown Georgetown.

It looks like your run of the mill restaurant... you know... with a view on the freaking sea. Argh, it was so ugly. I can just hear Rach whispering the same thing in my ear. You enter the restaurant and there's a big bar and then there is the terrasse overlooking you know what (I'm writing this, waiting for my flight home in Miami, and I literally want to cry). There was a huge mother f*ckin fan that was very VERY loud, so we had some trouble hearing each other but at least we got to practice our lip reading. It was a tad grey yesterday, with intermittent showers, but this view is always breathtaking!

We started with some breadfruit. I had never ever EVA eaten this! It's so much fun eating new things, isn't it? That sounds like a trap parents used to use when we were young. Breadfruit is very akin to a potato, in flavour and also in texture and appearance. Basically, it's a god damn potato, yo! Our waitress gave us an enormous amount of butter (I don't think I use this much butter in a full year) to put on the breadfruit. It was nice and crispy and SLIGHTLY dipped in butter and a bit of salt, it was a feast! I'm totes ordering more of this when I go back!

I ordered the Bammy Rundown. What is that, you ask? I had no effin clue before I ordered it. I actually wrote 'bambi' instead of 'bammy' on my phone. Bammy is a fried (because, when you can fry it, why not do it) Jamaican flatbread, made from yuca. It felt like I was eating polenta. It had absorbed all the yummy flavours of the broth and it was so easy to eat! Hello, calories! The snapper was fried and was looking at me with all its sharp teeth. Quite scary indeed! But man, that fish was gooood! Basically, it is cooked down with carrots, onions, okra and other veggies, so it literally was falling off the bone(s). I absoluely loved the okra, which we all know can be slimy if not cooked well. Mmmm, sliiiiime. Bah. You know me and textures! The veggies were cooked to perfection and oh so tasty. The broth was made with coconut milk, although it didn't taste like it. Rach told me that Caribbean cuisine uses a lot of coconut milk, but not necessarily for the flavour: her mom cooked rice and beans (yuuuuummy!) in coconut milk and we could detect it at all.  Anyhoot, this was a winner of a dish! AND it was cheap. Well, it was cheap in Cayman standards.

Service was great throughout the meal: we were greeted with a smile, seated right away and we got water and water refills in a timely manner. We also got our food quite quickly!

And now, the scores!

Food: 9

Service: 9

Do me a favour and go next time you're in Grand Cayman. You know, next time :)

Tortuga

I've been aching (yes, that bad) for some good Jamaican patties and I knew I was gonna get some awesome ones here. Cayman is only a one hour flight away from Jamaica so it's no surprise that lots of food (and people) from the land of Bob Marley have made their way to Grand Cayman. And I am one happy camper!

Tortuga is a place where dreams come true. OK, I'm exaggerating. You know me. They make rum, rum cakes (apparently the best in the world) and they make patties. What else can a girl ask for? Nothing. NOOOOTHIIIING!

Beef patty. I love me a good beef patty! I have a Jamaican restaurant not far from my place in Montreal (I'm international now) called Boom J's (if you live close to Verdun/Pointe St-Charles, please GO!) and they make freaking to-die-for patties. This one was perfect. Mmmmmmm!!! I might just bike there today and get me more of that heavenly goodness. The beef patty was everything it needed to be. It was soft, it was flaky, it was moist, it was hot, it was a bit on the spicy side and the dough was just perfect. I hate big fat patties that have a sh*t load of dough and then the corners are all hard and unpleasant. Well, this was nothing like that! I could've eaten 8 but that was, you know, exaggerated. Let's calm down now.

We also bought a chicken patty, for good measure. It's always nice to compare! The dough was good as well but the chicken was a bit on the dry side. Don't get me wrong, it was still good. But it was no yummy beef patty.

And now, the score!

Beef patty: 9.5

Chicken patty: 7

Don't even try asking me if I'll go back. I'm hopefully coming back to visit Rachie poo and Carl in March so I'll be buying a beef patty (or 17) as soon as my plane lands!

Over the Edge

Rachie poo and I were on our way to Rum Point, a very popular beach on the other side of Grand Cayman. I went there last year and had loved it so, hello, we had to go back again. On the way, there aren't that many open restaurants, especially on a Monday. We stopped by Over the Edge, this resto on the side of the Caribbean Sea. No biggie. The view was excruciatingly wonderful. Ugh. can I move here already?

The place itself was half bar, half restaurant, with a beautiful terrasse out back. Wow. Wow. Woooooow! I cannot say that enough. Wow! OK, that was the last one (in this paragraph). Being a Monday and not busy... at all, we sat at a prime spot on the terrasse, overlooking the Caribbean Sea in all its glory. F*******ck! Wow! OK, sorry, that was the last one.

Just had to show you another view from the restaurant. DAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN!!!

The waitress brought us some fried bread before we ordered and sh*t f*ck sh*t (sorry about all the swearing, kids), they were AWESOME!!! I'm gonna call them little bubbles of happiness. Yes. I'm gonna do that. With a bit of butter, holy f*ck sh*t f*ck man that was good. I hope I'm making myself clear here. Wow. So good and soft and... bready? Hahaha! But seriously.

We started with the best: conch fritters. When I first visited Rachie poo and her husband Carl, I ate some good conch fritters and was aching to eat some more! The fritters were awesome: very moist, and actually tasted like conch! You know, when sh*t is fried, sometimes it doesn't taste like much. They served them with somewhat of a tartar sauce that was oh-so-tasty and just a bit sour, going perfectly with them fritters. All I's gotta say is YUM!

We are on a mudslide quest, judging which one is the best on the island... like last time. Mudslides are everywhere, and we must taste ALL of them. This one, I believe, won the vacation. It was very alcoholic (hello!), the whipped cream was perfect and hello, chocolate! Yum AND yum! One would even say 'DANG'. In caps, of course, because it's THAT good. 

The main: cod and ackee, a Jamaican staple. The plate was HUGE and fully loaded. The potatoes were perfect and plentiful, to say the least. The rice and beans (a BIG staple in Jamaican cuisine), was perfect: rice was cooked to perfection and the beans too. Such a nice dish!!! The plantain, well, hello, it's plantain!!! I have never had bad plantain. Maybe because I love it so much! The ackee. Oh, the ackee. The ackee, the national fruit of Jamaica, was good. It was good. But it was mixed in with reeeaaaally salty and fishy cod. Ugh. I had the taste in my mouth for 3 days. Not good. NOT good.

Service was good: the waitress was very nice and fast but didn't ask us if we liked our meal. Meh.

And now, the scores!

Food: 6.5

Service: 7.5

Who knows, we might go back next time I come to Cayman, but I will FOR SURE not be having the ackee, you best believe it!

Luca

This is my second time on Grand Cayman. I came here last March to visit my old roomie, Rachie, who is from here (one of the 12 people that are actually FROM here), her husband Carl and their little one, Nini! One of the things I remembered the most fondly was Boozy Brunch. OK, 'remembered' is a big word. Basically, they give you mimosas until you drop. And I did drop. When we got home, I passed out on their beach for 2 hours and got a huge sunburn. It was like, 'what is that, a tomato? NO, it's Marie'. Ya. Anyhoot, I really wanted to do that again so we settled on Luca's!

Luca is located right on Seven Mile Beach, in a building that comprises of long and short term luxury condo rentals. We had a table indoors because it was oh-so-hawt, but the view from outside was just jaw dropping. Well, pretty much everywhere you go in Cayman has jaw dropping views. I wanna live here. I wanna live here so bad. But enough about my moving day. The restaurant is quite big inside and has a big terrasse as well. It's a bit on the dark side indoors, with lots of dark wood and dark ceilings. It's a good thing I was wearing my hot AND sexy (ya, that's right) dress because the hot girls started pouring in right after we were seated. I say 'it's a good thing' like I was gonna hit that or something. I wish. I. Wish. 

You get in and before even entering the restaurant, the dessert table is there to tease the hell outta you, and when you get in, dang, there is, wait for it, a plethora of platters filled with seafood (hello!!!) and breakfast fixings and fish and meat. Oh my! Basically, everything that is good on earth (except mr unaffordable lobster). I am MADE for all-you-can-eat buffets: I totally prep my stomach for it. You know, like the people that enter pie eating competitions? Like that. The stomach is a muscle, people! The trick is I eat a bit less the day before and in the morning, I'll eat maybe an egg and a fruit. That's it! You get there and you eat slowly so that your stomach doesn't fill up so quickly. Follow me. Trust in Marie.

As soon as my ass hit the chair, we were asked if we were going to go all the way (with the mimosas, not with the waitress). The answer to this question is yes. Always yes! Don't even think about it and just nod in the right direction for bottomless mimosas!

My first plate was...seafood! Just FYI, most of my plates were seafood. Why? Hello!!! I want to have my money's worth, I eat the expensive stuff. Sheesh! I put some crab legs in there, shrimp, mahi mahi ceviche, lobster salad, and a devilled egg, because I likes me a good devilled egg. I don't even know what to say about the crab: it's crab... it's the second to best piece of seafood you can eat. With butta. Oh, the butta! I had crab on every subsequent plate. The shrimp were good, you know, your normal shrimp. They had like 4 sauces to go along with the yummy shrimp. The lobster salad, although very flavourful, was a tad on the squishy side. Meh. Hey, at least I had like 3000 more things to choose from! The mahi mahi ceviche was damn good. DAMN good. Which is why I had it at least twice more. The flavours were right on and they weren't overpowering either. Very citrusy, which is what I like, Nay, love. The egg made me laugh because who makes devilled eggs this way? My friend Little Boo, that's who! I had to send her a picture. For all you non-makers of devilled eggs, you usually cut it the other way, so that the egg is longer and more stable on the plate. It was good but not the best.

Oysters!!!! As some of you know, I used to hate oysters. Ugh, just the thought of having something slimy go down my throat was enough to make me gag. It's a good thing those days are over and I am able to fully appreciate those bad boys. I've eaten some from the Pacific Ocean and the Atlantic Ocean... and my next words were going to be 'but never from the Caribbean' (she says with a big smile) but my friend has assured me that they probs got em' from the States. Damn YOU Donald Trump! OK, he has nothing to do with this, but...any chance I get...#FUdonaldtrump Point is, they were oh-so-good and juicy and just briny enough. Mmmm, just add a bit of tabasco and lemon, and you've got yoself a partay!

The salmon tataki had some cumin on it and was rather sweet, but not too sweet. It was really good. This, coming from a girl who used to be an expert at tataki (yes, I am many things). The tuna with sesame was good but not as good as the one we used to prepare at Sushi Taxi.

The meat! They had a table with a rather good looking man, serving up manly meat. I'm not straight, I swear it! Anyhoot, I had the rack of lamb and the ribs. The beef Wellington wasn't ready yet. As soon as I got back to the table, Carl asked me why I had taken the really REALLY fatty ribs. My only answer was that it is automatic for me to have the ribs. I see ribs, I want to eat ribs. But they were on the fatty side and not uber tasty (my life is over!). The lamb saved the day: juicy, tender, perfectly cooked and full of flavour. I was pacing myself so I had only taken one piece but man, I could've gone for at least another 4 (or 8). I saw someone bring the beef Wellington (not pictured) to the table and I may (or may not) have tripped, trying to get there faster. I gots to say, it was very good. BUT the dough around it was a tad on the undercooked side. 

The duck carpaccio. It was really really good. With a bit of sweet mango on top, this hit the spot. You know, THE spot. Nothin' else to say but YUM!

Not pictured is the beef carpaccio, with some wasabi butta, man! That butter made the dish, and then some!

The winners for me were the craaaaaaab (mmmm, put some clarified butta on that sh*t) and the mahi mahi ceviche. Mahi mahi is not a fish with much flavour, so koodos for making it so damn tasty!

Let's not forget dessert. As you can attest, I did not go overboard (taps herself on the shoulder). I had a tiny lemon tart (how tiny can one be?), which had just the right amount of lemon without being too tart, the sweet brownie with crunchy chocolate on top, the cheese cake with soft berry mousse that was just melt-in-your-mouth awesome and the meringue pop on a stick that was just so cute! Well, it was good too: crunchy and sweet as a meringue should be!

Service was 150% on par the whole way. We got seated in a second, got water and drinks in a minute. Our mimosas were filled every couple minutes which made for a very happy (and drunk) Marie. We could hear them opening prosecco bottles left and right. That is the sound of heaven, right there. They took our plates away as soon as they were empty. Now THAT's service, my friends!

And now, the scores!

Food: 8.5
Service: 9.5

I really want to say that I'll be back but, let's face it, I don't live here. Sadly. And with roughly 115$CAD (including tip) a pop, I can only do one boozy brunch per visit. Last time was at Agua, this time at Luca's, next, we're heading to the Ritz baby!

Miel

Another day, another meeting with friends. This time it was with ma boos from Sushi Taxi, Val and Mel. It's so sad when I'm almost forced to go eat at a restaurant. Ugh, I just hate it. You sense the sarcasm? You should. Peeps that personally know me KNOW I'm sarcastic 87% of the time. Miel had obviously been on my radar, it being a new restaurant AND in my neighborhood. Hello.

They fixed up the place in record time, in the span of a couple weeks. Chapeau. Cha. Peau. It looks really inviting and warm inside, with two separate rooms, lots of frames, dark tables, wood everywhere. It was super cuteness.

They brought us homemade focaccia first. Do you even realize how much I like homemade stuff? I like it because it means that a: they care about their products and b: they care about their clients. Oh, and it also means that they are competent. It's soooo easy to buy ready-made stuff and serve it on a plate! Way too easy. SO MANY restaurants do it. You don't even know. You know, because I know ALL their secrets. Ps: trust me, it's better if you don't know :p

It was a table d'hôte so I started with the gazpacho. This is supposed to be cold tomato soup. With, perhaps, some peppers, cucumbers, garlic, what have you. If there were any tomatoes in there, then that's a surprise to me because all I tasted were peppers. It was a tad too much on the sour side for me, as well as the two other girls that tried it.

The lamb burger. A big meh for this. MEH. There you go. The meat was unfortunately dry and the bun was nothin' special. The harissa mayo wasn't... harissa-ed enough (it's a thing, yo) and the caramelized onions were few and far between. All in all, somewhat of a miss. On the other (very surprising) hand, the salad, which was the ever-dreaded mesclun, was uber fresh and crunchy and actually quite tasty. Y'all KNOW I ain't a fan of that sh*t, but this was actually nice.

Dessert! We shared because the three of us were full BUT we are also little piggies, sooooo... That can only mean one thing! D-E-S-S-E-R-T!!! We had the feuilleté with strawberries and a lemon mousse. I'm not the biggest fan of fruity desserts (I mean come on, fruit is not a dessert!), but this one was nice and fresh. The lemon mousse was perfectly cold and the pate feuilletée was perfectly crunchy. One word: yummy!

Service was very professional throughout the meal. We got water in a timely manner and the waitress explained the menu very well to us. We also had the pleasure of meeting the owner because he knows Val, my ex boss. Ya, she cool like that.

And now, the scores!

Food: 7
Service: 9

Well, it's literally a 5 minute walk from my place and since restaurants are few and far between in Pointe St-Charles, there's a big possibility I'll be going back!

Cafe Neko

I stumbled upon Café Neko right after their opening, a couple months ago and had put it on THE list. The BIG list. The ever-growing list. Ugh. so many restaurants, so little time! Café Neko is this cute little Japanese restaurant right at the corner of St-Urbain and des Pins, and although it doesn't look like much from the outside, we were about to be pleasantly surprised! And you guessed it, I was having lunch with my main Asian squeeze, the Asian connection himself, Jer Bear.

There was a lot of construction right outside the restaurant, so once we opened the door, with the lovely classical music, it was like an oasis of serenity. Ya, I'm deep like that. The place is quite small with some tables and some seats at the window. Lots of pictures on the walls that were pretty god damn nice. It's owned by the two sole workers: a white dude and an Asian woman with a baby on her back. Basically, the cutest thing ever. I thought it was a back pack at first, but then realized it was a bébé and then I fell in love.

Jer and I started by sharing a couple very, VERY cheap entrees. Those are my FAVOURITE entrees. First: the Asian slaw with sesame dressing. Mmmm, mmm, mmmmm! So fresh, they had probably just picked the cabbage from their garden 2 minutes prior. It was nice and crunchy and the sesame vinaigrette was a bit gingery too which made it THAT much better. I actually don't think I've ever enjoyed a slaw that much in ma life.

Kimchi. I loooves me a good kimchi. I also hates me a bad kimchi. Thankfully, this one was up there! Perfectly fermented and just spicy enough. It wasn't my all time fave but kudos to the chef!

Beef dashi. FYI, dashi is a fish stock or simple broth usually made with kombu, bonito flakes, and it tastes damn didely delicious! There was rice, edamame, marinated ginger, green onions as well as some boiled onions. This was just wow. You should've seen Jer's face when he bit into a piece of beef. Holy hell that beef was tender. It was just falling apart in my mouth and oh, the flavor that it had absorbed!!! Umaaaamiiiii! Every time I say that word, I remember my Food Science teacher making a 'mmm' sound. Ah, ITHQ! The ginger added just what was needed to complete the lovely taste and the edamame added a nice texture. Oh, and the rice was perfect! Damn that dish was good!

Jer took the salmon tataki. I'm ALWAYS in for a good tataki. By the by, tataki means half-cooked. This was also a hit. The salmon melted in my mouth and the avocado just fit so well in there and had the perfect consistency! The nori added umami to it and the rice was perfect. YUM!

We were forced into having dessert. FORCED I say. OK, not really. We were full but didn't want to miss out on all that homemade goodness! I had the yuzu cheesecake. YES, a YUZU cheesecake. I'm gonna say that again: a yuzu cheesecake!!! I don't even know what to say to this except DAYUUUUMMMM! After each bite, it was like a punch to my taste buds with all that lovely citrus flavor. After Jer took a bite, his eyes opened wide and he said he wished he had ordered that instead of his homemade goodness.

Jer bear had the green tea ice cream sandwich. The ice cream tasted like green tea just the right amount and the homemade cookie was really freaking good and crunchy. But this had nothin' on my cheesecake. Nothin'!

Service was great throughout: water refill, quick service, smiles all around. Extra points for carrying the cutest little baby whilst doing it!

And now, the scores!

Food: 9 overall, 11 THOUSAND for the beef
Service: 9

What a great new discovery this was. Jer bear kept on saying he'll be going back and I'm for SURE going back too. OH, and it was cheap too! Excellent when you're on a budget!

Il Cortile

My dad eats lunch at nice restaurants about four times a year with his cousin and uncle. The last place had been Il Cortile and let's just say they had a bad service experience. My dad is difficult but for him to get three free meals because of this was something else! So, my dad decided to bring my step-mom and I. And we all know how much I like free food. A lot. I like it a lot.

I waited for my step-mom and dad right outside, from where the restaurant looked like, well, a cave! And then you enter somewhat of a basement type place and then BOOM, one of the best kept terrasse secrets in Montreal. This little courtyard was beautiful, with flowers hanging from balconies and paintings on the brick walls. Uber cute! I kind of felt like I was back in Europe. Ah, Europe, my first love! But enough about me and my lovers, apart from the cuteness, this place seemed to be hosting quite the richest in Montreal. Plastic surgery, fancy scarves and Louis Vuitton purses were everywhere I looked. It was almost like a secret society. Fo serious yo. So I was basically hiding under the table. But a girl's gotta eat...

The waiter brought us antipasto that consisted of prosciutto, grilled veggies, and parmesan. Basically, some of the best things on earth. I'd have more of that right about NOW. Those portobello mushrooms were literally to dsie for. DSIE. FOR. Stuff that is cooked in butter is ALWAYS good. The prosciutto melted in my damn mouth. A bite with mushroom, parmesan and prosciutto was like a little piece of heaven in my mouth.

Mushroom risotto. The risotto was cooked for just the right amount of time. Still a tad crunchy and not mushy. Texture was on par. They had cooked it in mushroom stock and they were very abondant in there as well. Again, who doesn't like mushrooms cooked in butta? The waiter shaved some parm on there and BAM, you got yourself a winner. That dish was so filling, it felt like I had gained 10 pounds in one sitting.

Service was probably one of the best I've had so far. In ma life. We got sparkling water very quickly, wine was served the proper way, and our waiter was more than present the whole time. He checked on us, refilled our glasses and asked us if we needed anything else.

And now, the scores!

Food: 8.5
Service: 9.5

I can say that I won't go back because, hello, I ain't no millionaire. But I did appreciate the wonderful service!